For the third morning in a row as my mind comes into consciousness I have had running clear as bell, the song, ‘Everything Changes’ by Julian Lennon. I heard it the first time two days ago – on the first day of 2017. Published it on my face book line, and then under an article. I can’t seem to let it go. The chording – the transitions from major to minor and slips into the major 7th’s – it’s all quite lovely – and the words echo my heart.
I awoke into instant clarity, which these days is a rarity… lol, at exactly 5:55 – I always look.
So, I sat in quiet with my morning coffee to see if I could ferret out from the corners of my brain why the song affected me so much that it had continuously played as my sound track for the past three days. What I excavated from the dead and buried in the grave yard of my brain’s past was the realization that; the way my little life was set up I never was allowed to feel that I was safe. Except in moments. I had an interesting household. So I developed this concept of ‘some-day’ I’ll be able to… and everything translated into that.
Someday I’ll be safe enough for long enough to create a life that will be beautiful, or someday I’ll have enough time to really do this, or that, or write this or learn that…and somewhere in all those somedays I began to realize that it was just that – someday, and it was not now. Even though, as a kid, I saw time stretching out in front of me as this vast golden path of things to come (yellow brick road…?), while in the now, you try to function through a world of instability and chaos and nothing is as it seems (on the outside). Because everything changes…just about the time you have all your ducks in a row to begin.
It’s like an unseen something’s way to wake you and keep you awake, because just as you fall into comfort…
And you think, ‘Oooops! That hurt.” It happens so predictably that you learn to be on alert all the time never releasing your diligence the part that watches, keeping an eye out, prepared for the next emergency, tragedy or exigency (urgent need or demand). The world, if you haven’t noticed is set up that way and recently it has become in your face obvious for all of us.
So this world never leaves us enough time to dream, to feel our soul and emerge with a true creation. On PURPOSE…
For: it is from that part of ourselves that the dream you would have and gift to others of your creation born of joy, comes from. And it is from the joyful creation of our inner selves, our true souls that we find it.
But, in truth,
And, would that could be, from a place of joyful opening of the light of our souls, instead of disaster. From the soul and a relaxed heart, instead of the threat of the continued pall of dissolution that hangs over this world. From the possibility of joyful, better and beautiful instead of prevention and fear of lack. From our mystical creative divine source. (Mystical only because that part of our being is purposefully misted over so that we are not aware of it, our power and our divine right to create, because what we are not aware of we cannot use.)
So this year one of my goals is to see if I can change my raison d’etre from constant contingency plans to divine creative design with joy and beauty from the center of my heart… (I’m not asking the impossible…right? lol)
Supposing you could create your heart’s dream straight out of your soul and gift it to yourself and the world…..the time, and any resources you needed and everything was possible, what would it be?…..