Do you see me now?

Like the Dr. said last night. We all have intuitive abilities. It is in our DNA. Every last one of us can do anything, in any realm, in any dimension.portal


How do I know this? I JUST know. And NO, it’s not just all in my IMAGINATION! My imagination IS my INTUITION! So watch it! Because you are creating this story you are involved in with every breath you take. I know I sound like a broken New-age woo-woo record. But…

In the words of Arnold Schwarzenegger just  “DO IT“.

do it

Have you ever noticed that every system of teaching out there that is about expanding and developing your intuitive abilities pre-suggests to you that you don’t have any abilities? Or that only after years of spiritual and social self-sacrifice will you be able to develop a modicum of the ability you are seeking?

When really all we need is a little sign that says ‘look here’…look_here


Granted, it helps if you’re not distracted but this whole world is about distracting us from what we already know. Even the teaching techniques themselves are a form of distraction.






( Sometimes I think autistics and ADHDs and all the rest of the alphabet soup have an advantage over us in that life can’t distract them from the real reality.)

Since I was a very little kid I’ve always wanted to know what was beyond that darned box. So I’ve played mind games with myself in order to try to see what it would be like to be different. Did you Ever blindfold yourself as a kid and try and walk around the house to see what would be like to be blind ? Have you ever tried to draw a picture using your feet and your toes as your fingers? braintobrainOr, have you ever walked around out in public pretending that you already could read minds and then been astounded when it worked? Have you ever touched anybody and gotten a flood of feelings from them as if they were your own?

We have all felt these things. And what we don’t realize is that it is our intuition already operating and giving us information and we are just not seeing the sign that says ‘look here’.

Really, when using this part of yourself to glean information, it is all about the question and the form the question not empty





And if you want to start playing around with this just put the idea in your mind that you want be more aware of this thread of information during the day and you will be mightily surprised at what you perceive.1ffae-art1




That damned Quantum Box….

If last night’s history was true, I have one question. Why, if these annunaki beings are capable of existing in ANY dimension, or plane, would they even CARE if we ascend, evolve, or got annihilated? Why after 450,000 years would there still be all the bull shit going on? Unless their evolution is tied to ours.md9 Like they got to where they wanted to be, one with source, and source said, “See that Fricking Mess you made on that planet a while back? Well it’s about to self-destruct, which will create a mess in that whole sector of the universe over there. Go clean it up now!”


There seems to be some disagreement as to HOW to do that. All based on a value system being put on the intrinsic heart of mankind, Adamu. heart energyAnd if last night’s history is true, THE ONLY THING THAT HAS EVER SAVED US IS LOVE. The love of a parent for his child. The empathy of one being to another.


Or, what we are looking at is yet another archetypal myth being played out on the big screens of our consciousness. We have the hero, the bad guy, who for some reason known only to him wants to hurt things, and us, the masses.The%20Holographic%20Universe%20-05 Then we have the static background upon which it all plays out. In my opinion, I still want to know what the damned screen is made of and why it works. I want to know why anybody would even bother with us, and care. As a planet we are such a mess. I want to know what we are, and I want to understand deep enough to be able to make my own decisions about who I am and who I will become.


What would really matter? Today, goodness has become and Ideal. Something to shoot for. That ultimately means you don’t have it. But maybe that is the myth/lie we are being led to believe, that we always need a savior and an Ideal. That immediately tells us that we are not inherently able to do this on our own. So the world is a mess because we always act out of the assumption that we are Not Capable. That is slave, pass the buck, not my fault mentality, where you always look outside of yourself for an answer. And that ALWAYS causes BAD eye And yet when you look into another’s eyes and you really see them, that bad behavior vanishes, because you are seeing the truth of another being.


In today’s world, we are taught that ‘us’ as the little guy and the individual don’t matter, that we must get the job done, we must deny our hearts to eat and provide for our loved ones instead of care for them.portal In a million tiny ways the system that we are enslaved to takes our ability to know and express this caring away, and makes it impossible to stop and say, “Waitaminit!”


Add to that the issues of our poisoned our food, water, the chemtrails, big pharm, taxes, banks, electric power, EMF’s, the false flags, creating utter confusion…. They (passing the buck?) are trying really hard to make sure we are way too damned busy to see something. If you get that part and you take a moment to stop and ask why, you fall down the rabbit hole only to get lost yet again.Qbox Enter that Damned box I’m trying to find the sides of. One day it’s just gonna smack me between the eyes… hopefully it won’t kill me when it does.


It still doesn’t answer my first question. Why would ANYBODY care about us enough to create the freaking mess we are in, or try and help us out of it, and for what reason?!?handspiral Or are we just infesting a piece of real-estate they want really badly?

Atmospheric Rivers

Directly from Scripps: Atmospheric Rivers

Atmospheric Rivers, Cloud-Creating Aerosol Particles, and California Reservoirs

Pilots, Doctors, & Scientists Tell The Truth About Chemtrails/Geo-Engineering

Our very own Cat_Vocals posted this on FB this morning.  Excellent read from one of my favorite sites:

Pilots, Doctors, & Scientists Tell The Truth About Chemtrails/Geo-Engineering


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One factor that’s commonly overlooked when it comes to talking about human health and environmental degradation is geo-engineering and Solar Radiation Management (SRM), also known as “chemtrails.” The name seems to come from the fact that various geo-engineering and SRM programs use stratospheric aresols like barium, nano aluminum-coated fiberglass [known as CHAFF], radioactive thorium, cadmium, chromium, nickel, desiccated blood, mold spores, yellow fungal mycotoxins, ethylene dibromide, polymer fibers and more.

Below is a video of multiple scientists, doctors and pilots telling the truth about “chemtrails.” It’s a very serious issue that’s often ridiculed and thrown into the conspiracy realm. As a result I attached information from an article I recently wrote about the subject.

Below is information taken on the same subject that we recently published. I attached it to substantiate the claims made in the above video to give it more substance. 

Very Brief History of Weather Modification

“Weather modification is generally considered to be the deliberate effort to improve atmospheric conditions for beneficial human purposes . Not all weather modification activities, however, have been designed to benefit everyone, and have been used for purposes of war” (1)

“The US Navy launched a weapon capable of inducing a powerful earthquake on Haiti. This time it was only a drill, and the final part of it is destroying and taking over Iran.” -Hugo Chavez, (then) president of Venezuela

Weather modification dates back to the 1940’s, when the General Electric Company demonstrated that a cloud of super-cooled water droplets could be be transformed into ice crystals when seeded with dry ice. Shorty after this it was discovered that fine particles of pure silver iodide with a crystal structure similar to that of ice were effective for global weather modification. As a result:

“Silver iodide remains the most often used materia 

 material in cloud seeding.”  (1)

The above statement was made in the 1970’s, but so much more has happened since. With silver iodide began the birth of spraying stratospheric aerosols into the Earth’s atmosphere. Silver iodide spraying began in the 1950’s (1), and has since proven to be extremely toxic, especially for the environment, human and animal health. You can learn more about it here.

Aluminum is another thing. It’s highly toxic and also very damaging to the environment.

The idea of spraying aluminum into our atmosphere goes way back, patents exist that clearly demonstrate the consideration of such materials that include the oxides of metals which have high emissivity. These include harmful substances like aluminum oxide and thorium oxide. A great patent example is one from the Hughes Aircraft Company that dates all the way back to 1990, that’s over twenty years ago. You can take a look at it here.

Fast forward to today, with even more chemicals added to the mix, this gives us the basic gist of geoengineering programs (image below) and why so many people are concerned about them.

“We do stuff in the stratosphere all the time off-course, so it’s not as though the stratosphere is absolutely pristine. But you don’t want to have people going off and doing things that involve large radioactive forgings, or programs that go on for extended periods or for that matter provide lots of reactive surfaces that could result in significant ozone destruction.” – (taken from the first film cited at end of article)
M. Granger Morgan, Carnegie Mellon University, University and Lord Chair Professor of Engineering and Public Policy, National Academy of Sciences Member

 Modern Day Spraying

“In addition to specific research programs sponsored by Federal agencies, there are other functions related to weather modification which are performed in several places in the executive branch. Various federal advisory panels and committees and their staffs – established to conduct in-depth studies and prepare reports, to provide advice or recommendations, or to coordinate weather modification programs – have been housed and supported within executive departments, agencies, or offices.” (1)

These programs are conduced by the department of defense, which means they remain classified, and why so many scientists and meteorologists don’t say anything about it. At the same time, all it really takes is observation.

Most of these programs are backed by the CIA and NASA, who are supporting the National Academy of Sciences with regards to geoengineering projects.(source)(source) Again, geo-engineering projects are any attempt to alter the way the planet or its weather systems operate, and as you can see, have been happening for a long time now.(source)(source)(source)(source)  The weather was even modified in China for the 2008 Olympics.(source)

If you are a constant observer of the skies, as I am, it’s not hard to see that something is already going on. After a day of spraying, the trails don’t evaporate, they spread out and block the sun.

Global dimming is another term people aren’t familiar with, 20 % of the Suns rays are not hitting the Earth. That means there’s a lot of metal up there” – Dane Wigington

Concerns have been voiced for years, by various individuals from all over the world. For example, Rosalind Peterson, president and Co-Founder of the Agriculture Defense Coalition (ADC), and x United States Department of Agriculture (USDA) employee stated at a 2007 United Nations hearing on global warming that:

“One of the things that’s affected by climate change is agriculture, but some of what we are seeing  is man made, but man made in a different way than what you may guess. Weather modification programs, experimental ones done by private companies, the US government, are underway and there are more than 50 operations underway across the United States. All of these impact agriculture because they change the micro-climates needed for agriculture to survive. None of these programs are done with oversight. International corporations are modifying our weather all the time, and modifying it in ways that cover thousands and thousands of square miles. Most of it is chemically altered, so what happens is that we are putting ground based chemicals that are shot into the air that change and modify our weather.”

You can read more, and view that full hearing here.

Geoengineering and chemtrails are a huge issue, and when talking about climate and environmental degradation, it’s something that must be mentioned, the fact that it’s not is very suspicious, given the fact that they’ve been spraying for and modifying our climate for so long.


Dane Wigington has an extensive background in solar energy. He is a former employee of Bechtel Power Corp. and was a licensed contractor in California and Arizona.  He is the lead researcher for and has investigated all levels of geo engineering from chemtrails to HAARP. He assisted Michael Murphy with his production of “What in the World are They Spraying” and has appeared on an extensive number of interviews to explain the environmental dangers we face on a global level.

This article has provides a fraction of the information that`s available out there. I highly recommend watching these two (below) documentaries on the subject and visiting for more information.  The documentaries below include much more information, and a lot of scientific data.

What In The World Are They Spraying? (Full Length)

Why In The World Are They Spraying? (Full Length)

Annotated Bibliography:

Obtained from the National Archives. A United States government document printed at the request of the United States Senate Committee on Commerce, Science and Transportation in November 1978.


Obtained from the NASA archives, a document prepared for the Interdepartmental Committee For Atmospheric Sciences. Prepared by Homer E. Newell,  a mathematics professor and author who became a powerful United States government science administrator—eventually rising to the number three position at the National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA), in the early 1960s.

A history of weather modification programs prepared by Dr. Vermeeren, Professor At The Delft University of Technology, faculty of industrial design engineering.  It’s a  300-page scientific report entitled, “CASE ORANGE: Contrail Science, Its Impact on Climate and Weather Manipulation Programs Conducted by the United States and Its Allies.” It was prepared for the Belfort Group by a team of scientists but presented anonymously. It was sent to embassies, news organizations and interested groups around the world “to force public debate.”


In 2009, researchers published “Modification of Cirrus clouds to reduce global warming,” which proposed two methods of delivery for this same proportion of metallics to silica and the same staying power of one to two weeks. The report notes that “the proposed scenario by the IPCC [Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change] in 2001 is identical to the claims” in Hughes Aircraft’s 1991 patent. Hughes was acquired by Raytheon, a private defense contractor, in 1997, “the same company that acquired E-systems and the HAARP contract.” 

The above referred to patent is linked within the article.

David L Mitchell and William Finnegan, “Modification of Cirrus clouds to reduce global warming,” Environmental Research Letters Vol. 4 No. 4, 30 Oct 2009. Available by subscription:

 A 1996 report by top military personnel in the U.S., “Weather as a Force Multiplier: Owning the Weather in 2025” to evidentiary details (like governmental spraying schedules, chemical orders, correct nomenclature used in airline operating manuals, and calls for geoengineering by economists) to support its notion of “heavy involvement of governments at the top level in climate control projects.” 


In 2007, the World Meteorological Organization (WMO) published a statement that included “Guidelines for the Planning of Weather Modification Activities.” Acknowledging that the modern technology of weather modification began in the 1940s, it is still “an emerging technology.”


This is VERY Interesting

dragonflythe Carat program

Linda Moulton Howe reported on the ‘dragon fly’ drones once in an interview I was listening to. What caught my attention was Project Carat. That is all about the ET language that is seen on the bottom of these things.  The language is what is supposed to make these things fly, the symbols themselves. Remind anybody of the descriptions of the Egyptians putting a piece of papyrus on the pyramid stones to move them?

Have a look see. What an interesting puzzle piece.


The Sovereign Box…Maybe

sov·er·eign·ty ˈsäv(ə)rən(t)ē/ noun noun: sovereignty

  1. supreme power or authority. “how can we hope to wrest sovereignty away from the oligarchy and back to the people?”
    1. synonyms:
  • the authority of a state to govern itself or another state. “national sovereignty”
    • synonyms:
  • a self-governing state.

  • plural noun: sovereignties Origin

late Middle English: from Old French sovereinete, from soverain (see sovereign). Translate sovereignty to Use over time for: sovereignty

Translations, word origin, and more definitions

From <>

I’ll tell you what my thinking of late has begun to look like. WHAT IF: the Illuminati, or whoever they are (if there is a they) has set up the bible as a script that we have been following, unthinkingly for 2000 years and all of this (mis?) information is also just a part of the script? What if we are STILL playing right into the hands of whatever, and the scope and breadth of the lie is far more sinister and far more entrenched and down the rabbit hole than we can possibly imagine? WHAT IF: we are ALL wrong, everybody? and this has been an attempt to get us to ignore “the man behind the curtain’? (whatever the F *** that is)


I make it a point to NEVER EVER just believe anybody for any reason EV-AR. I take it in, hold it for correlation… belief is giving up your sovereignty.  I’m trying really hard to be sovereign in my heart and mind. Probably because I am feeling something’s off and smelling a rat. CATBOXEverybody’s galactic this and federation that and ascension this and archons that and conspiracies abound, and and and…. So I am searching for a pattern outside of the freaking ‘ideologies’ of everything. I may be nuts, but as Rita says, “Bella, you don’t have a box.” ( I love that) and I’m just beginning to guess that I’m knocking around in a box big enough that I haven’t found the sides yet, but I’m starting to feel them.

This or that, yes or no = confusion that reigns in our hearts and minds. ON PURPOSE!!! Most times I just hang out in the aether and listen. Last night was interesting. I collect stories and data and make no judgments, waiting for as Kerry calls it, a triangulation. When three or more disparate sources say the same thing, then I will pursue it. I don’t know what to say about the colorations on the moon, except that I have heard several stories about the colors on mars being hidden and changed, if you believe that we have been, can get to mars through a gate, or an elevator, all compliments of the Montauk boys. How nice that those pieces all fit? So why would it be any different on the moon… Ahem

So why? Must we be confused so that we do not feel the resonances in our lives, so that we don’t feel? So we’d never notice and start asking questions? If that really is what’s up then what do we need to do?

Why not step waaaay out of the box and ask if we are actually seeing the right box? Might there not be an even bigger box that we can’t see and haven’t defined yet, but are just beginning to bang up against its sides??? I’m trying to get WAY outside the box at the moment… It’s baffling and hard. But something is not right, something stinks and I’m just starting to get a whiff of it.

Why do we even want a box? Plato, Soren, all of the early academic thinkers were trying to define how the universe works and why, because the universe was a surprising and dangerous place and if you knew more about it then you could be safer. So is fear a motivation for wanting a box or a system or a set of principles? So when did they get stuck and turn into be a cage? And there’s nothing wrong with a set of principles or systems or things that you can prove to yourself that becomes self-evident but what is wrong is when you blindly follow anything without understanding it and hand your sovereignty over to somebody or something else for a promise of safety or assurance. Maybe we are still suffering as a world from an unremembered traumatic memory of being wiped out in the last deluge and we are still looking for saviors to come and Save The World? Handing who or what you are away to anything or anyone for any reason is a form of slavery.

Then there is the ancient aliens theory – we were bred to obey, and worship and once again hand over our sovereignty to the gods (little g). One of my favorite sayings is:

If you meet Buddha on the road, kill him.

Belief of any kind is a trap. The real question is, What do you know in your heart and soul, in the strong quiet recesses of your heart? I’m always on about resonance and all my woo woo stuff, but resonance I can talk about. I’ve pursued it because I’ve felt it. It’s why I wanted to know about it in the first place. All my life things have happened like my Mom and my phone today. braintobrain  I left my phone at moms. Half way home for no reason I was curious about where my phone was. Why? Because she was attempting to call me and that action, or intent was enough for me to feel it. Via resonance. That and she was laughing like a loon when my phone started to ring in her hand when she called it from her phone….

What if reality is sooooo malleable, that if you knew just how malleable it was, it would scare the bejesus out of you? What if, if we knew , it would immediately crash those who have convinced us they have ALL the power? Its right there, it’s on the tips of our tongues, its hiding in 6 % of rotation…. If it had been a snake, it would have bit us already…. But that’s a slippery idea, one that we haven’t seen well enough yet to use it as a basis for transformation…yet!

By the way, I’m not saying they or it or any of this is not real, I’ve had contact. I’m just thinking we’ve been tricked into perceiving it in a very skewed manner. Now, for what reason or why or by who, I haven’t a clue. But I think I’m going to find out.








Politics to Prose’s interview of Annie Jacobsen on her book: Operation Paperclip


There are pictures in this interview that do not make it into the book. It is utterly, really disgusting to realize what we, as a nation, were willing to do for the prize. Some of those scientists were involved in Montauk and MKUltra.  I have this sneaking suspicion that this all started pre WWl.

Annie does a fine job of laying out all very clearly. Something for tonight.

Montauk Chronicles

mntk bigI had originally planned to write a review of the Montauk Chronicles, so I started to re-watch it. I bought it last night just so that I could have the extra interview footage to study. I realized halfway through again, that really what I needed to write about was about the visceral feelings this movie brought up in my heart and my gut. My mind is partially still stunned into silence, EVEN though I have studied this for years.


What this movie is really about is a monster that is still out there, still roaming free. Invisible and dangerous, stalking us with the same voracious antipathy towards the sanctity of life that it had at Auschwitz. In the end, some get away, but so does the monster, so you never know when it will come out of the darkness to strike again.


The most horrifying thing about this monster is that it is real.


When I was in high school, my freshman English teacher thought it would be a good idea to expose an entire class to the movie Night and Fog. I thought to include the URL at the end of this so you could take a look. Sadly you cannot find the entire movie. Only bits and scraps survive anymore. It was the most heart wrenching thing that ever happened to me at 15 ….and at 60, seeing in great detail what they found when they liberated Auschwitz. Until this movie.


At 48 minutes I was so upset at the abuse scenes and their truly horrifying depiction I couldn’t breathe. My heart was beating fast and I was slightly nauseated. Serious visceral reactions, rightly so, to facts that I had hoped I would never see become a reality again.


I try so hard not to look evil in the face, preferring to promote as much love and light as I can. Last night I felt like I was staring down it’s fetid, endless, evil maw. The stench of its breath withered me. This was our own little private Auschwitz, right here in the United States that nobody knows about. It screamed, it stunk of Nazi(!), of the cavalier disregard for life in the face of getting the prize.


The strength of spirit it must have taken to produce this movie, to make it, to birth it, is beyond my conception. I can’t imagine it. I would have been totally insane afterwards, if there was an afterwards. KUDOS Mr. Garetano. This was an eloquently crafted, visual bombshell. It adds the gut punch that just research cannot deliver. To those who watch this movie and don’t know enough to understand the story is very real, the concepts, the metaphors will be with them, opening their eyes. Maybe later on, but the seeds will be quietly waiting to germinate.


There is a huge messy war going on out there, between good and bad, light and dark positive and negative, service to self and service to others. From what I can tell at this point, its endless. It always will be at this level of being. I think the main question being asked of all of us living in an existence where this can happen is:


Which do you choose?

Ebani’s?? (Unidentified Anomalous Biological Entity) Any Theories, Faders?

Whoa I just saw this, this morning. I wonder what these people are seeing and filming.  Of course, it doesn’t surprise me that most of the You Tube videos I can find are from Mexico, and Italy… Are they trans-dimensional? I think it interesting that in the conversation Monday with CG, about the Montauk chair, that the idea that we shape what we perceive by our own ideas, that the ET’sterminatormetal were waiting for us to give them form and that in trying to tell us what we are perceiving the early cultural ideas about UFO’s and their occupants were set in stone, so to speak, before mankind created something really scary.  That said, could these beings (if they are beings) be closer to the truth? Don’t forget about the Archons, and Carlos Castaneda’s description of something very close to the Ebani.archon And maybe these thing are more visible to us because the idea has finally sunk into enough sleeping brains via cultural programming that these things can now be perceived because we have been told what to perceive. ? I remember hearing a story about how the head shaman had to first perceive the Spanish ships off the south American coast (because he thought out side the box for the tribe and he could perceive them. It was his job.) so he could then teach his tribe to see them, because their brains could not make sense of what their eyes were perceiving, therefore they didn’t see it.  What an amazing thought, but we are doing it every day in many ways, not even accounting for the EM spectrum we can’t perceive. So, my faders, what are your theories?  I’m intrigued. A whole new Whoa.  :)))